Sunday, February 15, 2009



My last relationship came to a shocking halt 6 months ago when my live-in boyfriend surprised me with his first emotionally available comment of our four-year relationship: He wasn't in love with me anymore. Since then, I've joined pottery classes and trekked to sports bars, in search of New York bachelors. When all I ended up with was a couple of one-night stands and a set of lopsided clay bowls, I sheepishly followed the slogan - hey, it's ok to look - and signed my single life away to match.com.

While throwing back a couple $5 PBR/whiskey shot specials at Doc Hollidays, my friend Jill bet that I would find my Valentine on the site. I wasn't exactly holding out, since the last email in my inbox read, "I first want to say that I love your personality very much and I really want you in marriage. Please don't waste a moment of our life, let us form a great couple, and then a great family. Waiting for your reply very soon…"

After my rendezvous with Rob, a law student who showed up 30 minutes late to tell me he already met someone, I decided I was done with online dating. If I wanted to pay for humiliation, I would have joined a sorority in college. As I signed in to cancel my membership, I noticed a message, from DateMe007 in the UK. I figured Newcastle was far enough away from New York so I wouldn't have to actually go on a date with him.

As I started speaking with the scruffy, pee-in-your-pants-funny, photographer - aka DateMe007 - I realized he was the first guy I would actually want to meet. An emotionally available dreamer, he encourages me to talk about things my ex would have never discussed and... he listens.

My charming British pen pal was the outlet I was looking for to help me figure out what I need in a relationship. This year, I'm spending Valentine's Day with my single girlfriends, but I'll be getting all the affection and encouragement I need from my inbox.



-Lauren Defilippo

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

god brits are hot

Anonymous said...

usually hot, but also usually not emotionally available, but either way, kudos. match.com....hmmm?

Anonymous said...

I tried match but I only met the losers. Some people have all the luck :)

2fers08 said...

Great writing! I hear ya, the dating scene can be tough, glad you have a sense of humor about it and a good friend to share stories!

pbr4life said...

OMG! i loooove doc hollidays and sororities. i'm conflicted, author.

pompfan said...

Wearing your heart on your sleeve...you seem like a catch.