Showing posts with label John Cusack. Show all posts
Showing posts with label John Cusack. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Who Will Survive Today?


My scientific-minded, unspiritual husband thinks I’m in a number worshipping cult. My obsession (which actually started before we met 3 years ago) is wrapped around elevens; a pair of them to be precise.

Seeing these numbers began whenever I looked at the digital clock near my bedside at night or on the computer screen in my office during the day. I always caught a glimpse of the time just as it turned 11:11. The numbers stared at me as if they had never changed.

When 11:11 or 111 or 1:11 began appearing on receipts, flight numbers and locations of buildings, I knew it was no longer specific to me. A quick google search demonstrated that I was right, in fact there were hundreds of books written on the subject.

There are many theories about the number 11, one of which belongs to the Mayans. An advanced society who believed the calendar would end on 12.21.2012, marking a rebirth of our world. Fast forward 20,000 years after the Mayan calendar is created and we have the cinematic effects of a movie like 2012. For all we know, this could be a grand publicity plot to build suspense for the world’s end. Far-fetched but possible.

So, if you are waiting patiently to witness the end of all days, 2012 is for you. There's California plunging into the ocean, Rome burning, Paris falling, the White House underwater and John Cusack dodging fiery volcanic comets to save his kids.

-Lori Bizzoco

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Scandal Sheet: Anything You Can Do, They Can Do Better



If you’re good, they’re great. If you’re great, they’re unbelievably fantastic. Things escalate to high levels, fast. The One-Upper gets nothing out of this besides momentary attention and long-lasting branding as a pathetic prick who needs their ego stroked whenever masturbation won’t cut it.

They can never take a backseat to somebody else’s good fortune. It’s selfish and infantile.

ONE-UPPER: “Oh, you saw Sean Penn in a restaurant? That’s funny, I just spoke to Tom Hanks, John Cusack and Kevin Spacey in a bar, and bought them drinks. Now we’re all best friends, and it’s going to be totally fun hanging in the Bahamas next weekend!”

Even more perplexing than what motivates the One-Upper is how to deal with this person. Do you acknowledge the higher stakes? Do you ignore them and switch topics? My favorite thing to do is engage in a duel of exaggeration.

ME: “The Bahamas, huh? That’s cool. I’ll be stopping there myself, three days into my two month cruise around the world with John Stamos, Will Ferrell, America Ferrera, Jack Black and the Dave Matthews Band.”

Sure, it’s sinking, but mildly amusing fun. Actually pretty exciting. OK, I confess, it’s the best way to spend time!


-Carly Okyle