Hitler Pissed About iPad

I'm watching as more and more publishers fall into the iPad trap, (they think it will revive their old business model). Mediactive even caught the New York Times losing some of their credibility for lavishing praise on this new it-toy. (Naughty naughty, that's one of the few value propositions you have left, NYT, your indelible and incredible pride.) Even that Modern Family episode had me confused as to whether this iPad is a real game-changer, or just a short-phase game. The kind that "fun" dad's everywhere will be excited about for a couple of weeks before moving on. But, I may just be a hater. Either way, I'm not hatin' as much as Hitler.



(Thanks to the lovely Canadians for showing me this.)

Now that dude is pissed.

Rabbit or Duck? Apparently, Rabbit

Yes, I watch How I Met Your Mother. I got hooked about two years ago when I had nothing to watch and a sudden expanse of free time. The characters are solid, Neil Patrick Harris is funny and they choose great music for scenes, (my favorite: Mother of Pearl by Roxy Music playing when Ted realizes he loves his bestie). So when last week they had their debate, of rabbit or duck and which is better... I had to agree with the general consensus of duck. I'd rather eat duck, hang out with ducks, watch ducks, and so on.



But apparently, in New York, right now, all the rage is rabbits. What is interesting is that the call for rabbits has more to do with the call for conscientious eating, heralded by Michael Pollan and Food, Inc. There have been growing trends to eating and shopping local, and learning the ins and outs of label reading. So... why rabbits?

Well, according to this NYT article (about the rabbit killing class in Bushwick - sorry I missed it), rabbits are easy to raise in small spaces, easy to kill, but also historically known as the crisis-war-time meat.

So where do you stand on the issue? Do you hate seeing cute wittle bunny wabbits being killed? Or are you ready for some rabbit stew?

Farming & Breeding Fresh Rabbits for NYC Restaurants *food curated* from SkeeterNYC on Vimeo.

-Kastoory

Showroom Dummies

As long as I can remember, I’ve watched Saturday Night Live. Not ‘cause it’s consistently funny or even worthwhile. I’m just a loyal consumer.

Then sometimes a TV show can take a fatal, ridiculous turn, and it becomes forever dead to me. I’m looking at you, Grey’s Anatomy, or “Postal Service Hospital: the O.C./ER,” I call it. I was never really invested, aside from my girlhood love for Patrick Dempsey, but my friends watched it, so I figured what the hell. But the moment that chick from Sideways was impaled with the fallen icicle I forever turned my back on those philandering doctors. I like preposterous tripe, but that was way too much.

I’m like this with lots of stuff: film directors, sushi bars, dudes. I’m a Scorpio: Loyal to a fault, so when shit gets super-fucked, it usually spells curtains for us. Some may call this behavior “vindictive,” or “petty,” but, you know what? Fuck those guys! They’re dead to me, too.

These days, Old Navy’s number one with a bullet on the Dead-to-Me List. The cheap-but-on-occasion-cute clothing chain’s latest “Super Modelquins” campaign features a rag tag bunch of stiff yet racially diverse ON mannequins who get engaged, lose their fingers, have leg tattoos of former lovers and suffer morning sickness all the while dressed in affordable resort wear. Each commercial plays like a soap opera serial that pits the ‘quins in dramatic situations I’d barely care about if the people in question were actual humans. I mean, who gives if Josh can’t choose between Kelly and Heather? First of all, Kelly and Heather look exactly alike. And Josh is a fucking eunuch. Why would Kelly or Heather even want to vie for his fake plastic love in the first place?

Old Navy’s launched True Hollywood Story spoofs about the origin of the Super Modelquins on YouTube. They’re on display in all Old Navy storefronts. Shoppers are encouraged to snap photos with Kelly, sporting a bold Old Navy tankini for only $24.99. Or obligatory black modelquin, mother of two Michelle, summer ready in her Old Navy town gown. Town gown? Really? As if calling them “maxi dresses” last year wasn’t enough.

Previous O.N. ads featured Morgan Fairchild and the late Carrie Donovan, bespectacled fashion doyenne of the New York Times, kitsching about in performance fleece. The spots were corny and charming. Not that I’d ever wear performance anything, but my closet floors have been known to be littered with an occasional Old Navy cotton dress. Until, you know, the ‘quins came to town.

Maybe I’d like ‘em more if the Super Modelquins were magical and came to life, like Pygmalion’s beloved statue in Greek mythology, Andrew McCarthy’s beloved Kim Cattrall in the 1987 movie Mannequin, or Jodie the window display designer’s be-hatted Jeff from creepy 1980’s Canadian children’s show Today’s Special.

Yeah, I’d probably budge on my boycott if that happened. Because being a true blue Scorpio, my vindictiveness is only matched by my willingness to forgive.

–Megan Metzger