Thursday, December 3, 2009

New York State Senate Not Ready For Big Boy Pants



The New York Times reported yesterday that the New York State Senate voted down a bill that would allow gay couples to get married, giving all the adults in the room a clear indication that the 38 senators who voted against it are not yet ready for big boy pants.

The adults in this case are quoted as saying that the 38 senators who voted against it will be allowed to stop wearing diapers just as soon as the idea of two same-sex strangers getting married does not cause them to shit their pants.

Pictured here is Carl Kruger, the only Brooklyn Democrat to vote against the bill. Multiple calls to his offices were not returned for comment by press time, though we have been promised a press release regarding the issue.

In all seriousness, I want to remind everyone what's at stake here: this is not about changing the rules of any church or religious organization, nor is this about a wave of angry leather daddies in assless chaps riding the subway with erect cocks to the statehouse to have unprotected buttsex on the steps of the capital while wiping their shit-muddied semen on every blank marriage certificate they can get their hands on.

This is about the basic family rights currently denied to homosexual couples, some of whom have been in loving, monogamous relationships for decades who have been denied the right to see their partners in emergency rooms, who have been denied the right to have joint adoption of a child (Can you imagine - your partner dies and you have no legal relationship with your child? None?). Whatever your beliefs about marriage as a religious or social institution, when we deny marriage rights to same-sex couples, we are denying them access to very important and life-changing legal protections and rights that every heterosexual has free and open access to. There is no rational justification against the legal status of marriage for homosexuals.

When you deny homosexuals these rights, you are not defending marriage. (If you were really interested in the sanctity of marriage, you would, like this California satirist, ban divorce.) You are being mean. You are denying life-changing rights to strangers for no good reason.

If you vote against gay marriage, you are a mean dick.

Here is a video of gay couples, individuals, and straight allies talking about how much marriage equality means to them, after winning it in Connecticut.

Full disclosure: I shot and cut this video.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

the video is amazing and that article on banning divorce, hilarious. if they were serious about protecting the sanctity of marriage then yes, divorce should not be allowed. take the logic further, because if divorce were illegal, how many people would be getting married?